Daniel Costa has been announced as Pilli's most unnatractive player with a narrow win of 100%. 27 votes were counted, one of which I hear is his own mistress.
Congratulations Daniel, we are all hotter than you.
Yes, I did just google 'ugly'.
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Pilli Play Balls...but win
LPFC U21's have scraped through the weekend with an unconvincing win against a 10-man Meani Hawks 2 side, with goals from striker Alex Poulos and midfielder Matthew Phipps enough to seal all three points.
After torrents of rain had pelted hapless Sydneysiders the few days prior, it was thought that the weekly ritual of club football that we all know and love would have been called off. Suffice to say it was not, a discovery made by a very few keen beans who sat at their computers at 7am that morning - finger's furiously tapping away at the refresh button on the club's hompage. As a result of previous downpours, Pilli's match was moved to the Ridge 3, where they would play table-toppers Menai Hawks 2 and where they have already played twice before this season.
Wind was the player's biggest foe on an unusually dry pitch at the Ridge, which was recognised by Pilli who decided to run with the element after winning the toss. Menai's lack of numbers was obvious right from the get-go with Pilli comfortably passing rings around their opposition. That being said, it was a matter of seconds before Pilli put themselves in front against a side which they had expected a particularly difficult game from.
Because I'm writing this blog hell late I can't exactly remember how we scored our first - all I know is that is was a simple tap in from Poulos. For the record he didn't go out the night before, but rather spent till 3am driving around banging bitches. Anyway, the usual thing happened where all our fans went into ecstasy, with the camera man zooming into some little kid crying with pleasure until he realised he was on tv and starting cheering and telling everyone, only to not realise camera men hate when people discover they are being filmed and had already switched frames.
After a suprisngly bright start to the match Pilli continued their attempts to pile on the pressure, but consistently managed to lose the ball in the final play. From here it was pretty much down-hill. Lethargy and complacency slowly bled their way into Pilli's play, for which the wingers may be criticised the most of all for not pulling out wider and making more darting runs. A typical Pilli attack consisted of a centre midfielder dribbling the ball up through the middle only for every other player to bolt forward towads the centre/not even move, leaving the dribbler with either a congested path or no options, respectively.
Time after time Pilli's attacks failed, which was not made easier when the opposition did nothing but clear the ball with a massive kick - slowing the game down to about as fast as William Clayden can run. It didn't come as a suprise that Pilli's next goal was a piece of individual brillance from Phipps. At about 20-yards out, Phipps controlled a bouncing pass beautifully and swept a long gliding ball into the opposite side of the goal - silencing his critics who have recently claimed he's shit.
You'd think that a goal would've aroused a poor PIlli side - it didn't. It was only as matter of time before one of their fustrating attacks was flipped on its back and turned into a rapid counter from Menai. A lost ball on the left wing prompted a Menai defender to lob the ball up to half-way where his teammate rounded sweeper Kurtis Thompson and succesfully placed a ball past fill in 'keeper Matthew Burg - leaving no chance for another now famous 'Burg sheet'.
As the referee blew for the end of the first period, an obviously fustrated Will Clayden was reportedly seen backhanding a female fan.
The second half contained no goals, hence we played just as bad, if not slightly better - probably because of the furious rant we were given by Clayden since he's heaps intimidating.
Pilli's win leaves them a mere one point behind both first-placed Menai and second-placed Barden Ridge 1 - with the season only at the half-way point. Daniel Costa received the game's M.O.M. as he at least showed some sort of enuthusiasm. Pilli's next match comes' at home next week against last-placed Bangor at home. We better win or else I'm gunna hit up Bundeena Maianbar.
After torrents of rain had pelted hapless Sydneysiders the few days prior, it was thought that the weekly ritual of club football that we all know and love would have been called off. Suffice to say it was not, a discovery made by a very few keen beans who sat at their computers at 7am that morning - finger's furiously tapping away at the refresh button on the club's hompage. As a result of previous downpours, Pilli's match was moved to the Ridge 3, where they would play table-toppers Menai Hawks 2 and where they have already played twice before this season.
Wind was the player's biggest foe on an unusually dry pitch at the Ridge, which was recognised by Pilli who decided to run with the element after winning the toss. Menai's lack of numbers was obvious right from the get-go with Pilli comfortably passing rings around their opposition. That being said, it was a matter of seconds before Pilli put themselves in front against a side which they had expected a particularly difficult game from.
Because I'm writing this blog hell late I can't exactly remember how we scored our first - all I know is that is was a simple tap in from Poulos. For the record he didn't go out the night before, but rather spent till 3am driving around banging bitches. Anyway, the usual thing happened where all our fans went into ecstasy, with the camera man zooming into some little kid crying with pleasure until he realised he was on tv and starting cheering and telling everyone, only to not realise camera men hate when people discover they are being filmed and had already switched frames.
After a suprisngly bright start to the match Pilli continued their attempts to pile on the pressure, but consistently managed to lose the ball in the final play. From here it was pretty much down-hill. Lethargy and complacency slowly bled their way into Pilli's play, for which the wingers may be criticised the most of all for not pulling out wider and making more darting runs. A typical Pilli attack consisted of a centre midfielder dribbling the ball up through the middle only for every other player to bolt forward towads the centre/not even move, leaving the dribbler with either a congested path or no options, respectively.
Time after time Pilli's attacks failed, which was not made easier when the opposition did nothing but clear the ball with a massive kick - slowing the game down to about as fast as William Clayden can run. It didn't come as a suprise that Pilli's next goal was a piece of individual brillance from Phipps. At about 20-yards out, Phipps controlled a bouncing pass beautifully and swept a long gliding ball into the opposite side of the goal - silencing his critics who have recently claimed he's shit.
You'd think that a goal would've aroused a poor PIlli side - it didn't. It was only as matter of time before one of their fustrating attacks was flipped on its back and turned into a rapid counter from Menai. A lost ball on the left wing prompted a Menai defender to lob the ball up to half-way where his teammate rounded sweeper Kurtis Thompson and succesfully placed a ball past fill in 'keeper Matthew Burg - leaving no chance for another now famous 'Burg sheet'.
As the referee blew for the end of the first period, an obviously fustrated Will Clayden was reportedly seen backhanding a female fan.
The second half contained no goals, hence we played just as bad, if not slightly better - probably because of the furious rant we were given by Clayden since he's heaps intimidating.
Pilli's win leaves them a mere one point behind both first-placed Menai and second-placed Barden Ridge 1 - with the season only at the half-way point. Daniel Costa received the game's M.O.M. as he at least showed some sort of enuthusiasm. Pilli's next match comes' at home next week against last-placed Bangor at home. We better win or else I'm gunna hit up Bundeena Maianbar.
Sunday, May 16, 2010
Working in Treacy's Favour
Pilli 1 Irish midfielder Michael Treacy has runaway with the title for...running. Treacy won the majority vote with a 44 percentile, leaving Fynn second (17%) and Poulos third (14%) in his wake. Some say Treacy rigged the voting, although this is others say this is highly unlikely given the amount of friends the player has...I love saying 'some say, other say' in an attempt to avoid getting into Treacy's bad books.
Congratulations Michael 'Phar Lap' Treacy.
Everyone call him that now.
Saturday, May 15, 2010
Rubbish Ridge Get Fucked Over By Pilli
Excuse the french...
Pilli have come out victors after a rugged affair with a particularly physical Barden Ridge 1 side, winning the match 1 - 0. A single goal from Matthew Phipps was enough to see his team through a match shrouded with controversy - mainly to do with whether or not the referee had dyed his eyebrows.
Pilli arrived to the fixture without the services of Costa, Clayden and Clark - or as everyone likes to call them - 'The 3 Muskateers". Jokes, no one calls them that! Heaps-funny-jokes-that-will-get-me-so-many-chicks aside, Pilli were fortunate enough to to have the likes of striker Alex Poulos and team manwh...defender Kurtis Thompson cleared of any injury. Replacing the unavailable players were Thompson Jr, Foldi Jr. and Phipps Jr. - all from Pilli's U18 youth squad. I purposely didn't mention you weren't playing Squeak since it would've ruined the whole muskateer thing.
The match began in the most unusual of fashion when the referee assembled both teams on a completely different field as to which they were scheduled to play on. The ethnic ref then went on to say something about how he probably has no life other than reffing D-grade football and how his mail-order wife makes the best tasting kebabs. No I'm not making generalisations.
Weirdness aside, Pilli began the match with the wind in their favour. Both teams took a while to settle and then ease into the game. Pre-match, Pilli had already discussed their plan to stay level-headed due to the referees' by-the-book reputation and they remained true to their strategy - though much less can be said about their opposition.
Ridge players constantly tried to bully their way to the ball and more often than not were not pulled up by a referee who seemed to be more interested in disciplining the sideline than the players themselves. One one particular occasion male model Fonseca tackled the shit out of one Ridge player, only for the faggot to try and stomp his tackler while on the floor. There was blood everywhere.
Nevertheless, Pilli remained defiant against their oppositions' dirty play and managed to grab the first, and what was to be the only goal late into the first half. Left winger Stephen Foldi sent a neat pass to Healey who was positioned about 30-yards out from goal. In amongst this move, a tenacious Matthew Phipps sped along past Healey who dinked a perfectly weighted through-ball over the defenders fat heads. Still running, Phipps controlled the ball and took a shot only for the oppositions 'keeper to block the attempt and send the ball straight back to the midfielder who made no haste in tucking away the second opportunity. After this Phipps pretty much had a shit game...LOL jks Phippsy you had a good game, don't get all sero at me.
Renewed, Pilli continued going forward against a relentlessly physical Ridge side. On on ocassion Fonseca let loose a curling left footed strike which looked promising, only to be caught well by the opposition 'keeper. Though, one of the best chances in the match went begging after striker and last week's hattrick hero Alex Poulos made a mess of a one-on-one situation with the Ridge 'keeper - maybe the suspicious stamp on his right forearm reading 'RnBSuperclub' was the reason for such a miss, or maybe it's just the fact he said to me pre-game 'omg man I've never been so drunk in my life as I was last night'...but those are just theories.
The second period began much like the first and sprouted no real golden opportunities although Ridges' controversial tactics ensued - the most serious occuring when Foldi Jr. was hacked down in his own-half, with Ridge refusing to kick the ball out and then one of their players calling out in 'hope' that the Pilli youths' leg was 'broken'. An example of this Ridge players haircut is shown below.
Enough said.
Matthew Burg continued to shine in between the sticks with another imperial performance and a second clean sheet along with it. The Pilli fill-in 'keeper caught opposition crosses and shots with breathless ease, seemingly like it was all routine. Burg also produced an incredibly important save late in the second half which would've almost certainly resulted in a Ridge goal without his intervention.
Jacob Healey, Michael Treacy and defender Jackson Versitano should also be commended on impressive performances. Healey often controlled the midfield with is pin-point passing, which earned him the prestigious man-of-the-match award. Last week's MOM Versitano used his build to good effect as he remained vigilant in the face of the tough-tackling opposition, while also constantly tracking back with his man. Treacy lived up to his probably-rigged title win of 'Team workhorse' and never gave up, sometimes even winning the headers against opposition who were probably worth 4-squeaks up on the squeak-scale.
Anywho, once the referee blew for time Pilli fans cheered in delight for their teams solid win - one which will possibly leave them within one point of the top of the table, a ranking which may well be swapped after next weeks exciting clash with Menai Hawks 2. Also, below I have posted this weeks referee's number plate and car model so do what you want with it, it's probably illegal I know but I'm willing to do time for this team such is my committment. And no I didn't actively seek these details out, the little chode was leaving as I was getting into my car.
Pilli have come out victors after a rugged affair with a particularly physical Barden Ridge 1 side, winning the match 1 - 0. A single goal from Matthew Phipps was enough to see his team through a match shrouded with controversy - mainly to do with whether or not the referee had dyed his eyebrows.
Pilli arrived to the fixture without the services of Costa, Clayden and Clark - or as everyone likes to call them - 'The 3 Muskateers". Jokes, no one calls them that! Heaps-funny-jokes-that-will-get-me-so-many-chicks aside, Pilli were fortunate enough to to have the likes of striker Alex Poulos and team manwh...defender Kurtis Thompson cleared of any injury. Replacing the unavailable players were Thompson Jr, Foldi Jr. and Phipps Jr. - all from Pilli's U18 youth squad. I purposely didn't mention you weren't playing Squeak since it would've ruined the whole muskateer thing.
The match began in the most unusual of fashion when the referee assembled both teams on a completely different field as to which they were scheduled to play on. The ethnic ref then went on to say something about how he probably has no life other than reffing D-grade football and how his mail-order wife makes the best tasting kebabs. No I'm not making generalisations.
Weirdness aside, Pilli began the match with the wind in their favour. Both teams took a while to settle and then ease into the game. Pre-match, Pilli had already discussed their plan to stay level-headed due to the referees' by-the-book reputation and they remained true to their strategy - though much less can be said about their opposition.
Ridge players constantly tried to bully their way to the ball and more often than not were not pulled up by a referee who seemed to be more interested in disciplining the sideline than the players themselves. One one particular occasion male model Fonseca tackled the shit out of one Ridge player, only for the faggot to try and stomp his tackler while on the floor. There was blood everywhere.
Nevertheless, Pilli remained defiant against their oppositions' dirty play and managed to grab the first, and what was to be the only goal late into the first half. Left winger Stephen Foldi sent a neat pass to Healey who was positioned about 30-yards out from goal. In amongst this move, a tenacious Matthew Phipps sped along past Healey who dinked a perfectly weighted through-ball over the defenders fat heads. Still running, Phipps controlled the ball and took a shot only for the oppositions 'keeper to block the attempt and send the ball straight back to the midfielder who made no haste in tucking away the second opportunity. After this Phipps pretty much had a shit game...LOL jks Phippsy you had a good game, don't get all sero at me.
Renewed, Pilli continued going forward against a relentlessly physical Ridge side. On on ocassion Fonseca let loose a curling left footed strike which looked promising, only to be caught well by the opposition 'keeper. Though, one of the best chances in the match went begging after striker and last week's hattrick hero Alex Poulos made a mess of a one-on-one situation with the Ridge 'keeper - maybe the suspicious stamp on his right forearm reading 'RnBSuperclub' was the reason for such a miss, or maybe it's just the fact he said to me pre-game 'omg man I've never been so drunk in my life as I was last night'...but those are just theories.
The second period began much like the first and sprouted no real golden opportunities although Ridges' controversial tactics ensued - the most serious occuring when Foldi Jr. was hacked down in his own-half, with Ridge refusing to kick the ball out and then one of their players calling out in 'hope' that the Pilli youths' leg was 'broken'. An example of this Ridge players haircut is shown below.
Enough said.
Matthew Burg continued to shine in between the sticks with another imperial performance and a second clean sheet along with it. The Pilli fill-in 'keeper caught opposition crosses and shots with breathless ease, seemingly like it was all routine. Burg also produced an incredibly important save late in the second half which would've almost certainly resulted in a Ridge goal without his intervention.
Jacob Healey, Michael Treacy and defender Jackson Versitano should also be commended on impressive performances. Healey often controlled the midfield with is pin-point passing, which earned him the prestigious man-of-the-match award. Last week's MOM Versitano used his build to good effect as he remained vigilant in the face of the tough-tackling opposition, while also constantly tracking back with his man. Treacy lived up to his probably-rigged title win of 'Team workhorse' and never gave up, sometimes even winning the headers against opposition who were probably worth 4-squeaks up on the squeak-scale.
Anywho, once the referee blew for time Pilli fans cheered in delight for their teams solid win - one which will possibly leave them within one point of the top of the table, a ranking which may well be swapped after next weeks exciting clash with Menai Hawks 2. Also, below I have posted this weeks referee's number plate and car model so do what you want with it, it's probably illegal I know but I'm willing to do time for this team such is my committment. And no I didn't actively seek these details out, the little chode was leaving as I was getting into my car.
XYT 567 Mitsubishi Verada
=]
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
Extended World Cup Squad Announced, No Pilli Players Make the Cut
The Australian extended world cup squad has been announced. The announcement, which comprises of 31 players, shockingly does not include a single LPFC U21's player. Prior to the announcement Pilli midfielder, £25 million-man Jacob Healey and 'keeper Will Clayden were thought to be a certainties, while defenders Fynn and Costa were dubbed as having an outside chance to represent the national team. Critics had even gone so far as to say Clayden, even after suffering a knee dislocation ruling him out for 2 or more months, would still be a key squad member due to the immense level of commitment he often displays. They then went on to say 'jokes, Clayden is a heaps shit goalkeeper compared to Mark Schwarzer'.
However, if a Pilli had been chosen in Verbeeks' squad it would've been likely LPFC to have turned him down due the club's current injury crisis and top-of-the table clash with Barden Ridgebacks 1 this weekend. Devoed.
Australia: Michael Beauchamp, Mark Bresciano, Tim Cahill, Nicky Carle, David Carney, Scott Chipperfield, Jason Culina, Brett Emerton, Adam Federici, Eugene Galekovic, Richard Garcia, Vince Grella, James Holland, Brett Holman, Mile Jedinak, Brad Jones, Josh Kennedy, Harry Kewell, Shane Lowry, Scott McDonald, Mark Milligan, Craig Moore, Lucas Neill, Jade North, Tommy Oar, Nikita Rukavytsya, Mark Schwarzer, Carl Valeri, Dario Vidosic, Luke Wilkshire, Rhys Williams
However, if a Pilli had been chosen in Verbeeks' squad it would've been likely LPFC to have turned him down due the club's current injury crisis and top-of-the table clash with Barden Ridgebacks 1 this weekend. Devoed.
Australia: Michael Beauchamp, Mark Bresciano, Tim Cahill, Nicky Carle, David Carney, Scott Chipperfield, Jason Culina, Brett Emerton, Adam Federici, Eugene Galekovic, Richard Garcia, Vince Grella, James Holland, Brett Holman, Mile Jedinak, Brad Jones, Josh Kennedy, Harry Kewell, Shane Lowry, Scott McDonald, Mark Milligan, Craig Moore, Lucas Neill, Jade North, Tommy Oar, Nikita Rukavytsya, Mark Schwarzer, Carl Valeri, Dario Vidosic, Luke Wilkshire, Rhys Williams
Monday, May 10, 2010
Mark Missing Berrie Dome?
It has been reported former Pilli Captain and current Accrington Town player Mark Andersson may make a return to LPFC as soon as next season. The player is reportedly suffering from acute homesickness but wishes to fulfill at least one season at his new club in England before making a return to his former stomping ground that is the Berrie Dome. Andersson shocked the nation when he opted to switch leagues earlier this year, a move that hurt many Pilli fans. It remains to be seen whether they will accept their former captain back, though it is expected the squad will welcome him back with open arms....and a f%&king massive party.
Report: Injuries Galore at the Berrie Dome
ESPNsoccernet claim LPFC U21's are suffering an injury crisis, with some players in a desperate race against the clock to be fit for their next match on Saturday. Defenders Paul Clark, Kurtis Thompson and top goalscorer Alex Poulos are all said to be half-chances to make an appearance against the Ridgebacks this weekend. Additionally, Daniel Costa has already been ruled out of Pilli's next fixture after being given special consideration by the club for an unknown period of time. Long-term injury Will Clayden is also ruled out unless he is outrageously committed. This leaves Pilli facing the Ridgebacks with a nine-man squad on Saturday - though it is possible some youth or reserve players will be handed debut performances in an attempt to avert the crisis.
Healey Under Control
Attacking midfielder Jacob Healey has romped his way to the title of 'player with the best ball control' with a 44% majority vote - of which he claims he didn't even vote for himself. Healey's closest competitor came in the form of William Clayden who racked up a 20% slice of the votes. Versitano, Treacy and Poulos came in equal third with three votes each.
Congratulations Jacob 'junior ronaldinho@hotmail.com' Healey.
Congratulations Jacob 'junior ronaldinho@hotmail.com' Healey.
Saturday, May 8, 2010
Where There's No Will There's a Way...to get a cleansheet.
LPFC U21's have finally had their bed linen returned from the dry-cleaners(probably asian-owned) with a resounding 3 - 0 win at home against a plucky Meani Hawks 1 side. Pilli striker Alex Poulos walked away with the match ball (which was already ours anyway) after scoring an immaculate hat-trick and lifting his side to a four-match unbeaten run.
Initially, Pilli began the day knowing they would be down three players - Clayden, Phipps and Treacy - due to injury, work and vacation respectively, meaning the bench would be cut down to just one. Staff were given further reason for concern when frontman Poulos made contact and said he was 'stuck in traffic' - which happens to alot of professional footballers these days. What've we all learnt from that? Live in the Shire.
Thankfully, Poulos arrived just in time and a further boost to team morale came in the unlikely form of Phipps, who was racing back from Smithfield (wtf) to participate in the match. Midfielder Matthew Burg stood between the sticks, filling in for the injured Clayden who was watching from the stands. All seemed well and just as the gap-toothed referee managed to blow his whistle to signal the start of the game.
Both teams began brightly, showing an obvious hunger for the ball. As the half progressed Menai displayed aerial prowess while Pilli dominated the ground play with some skilful dribbling and passing from their apparently good-looking midfielder Jacob Healey. Pilli's defence withstood a barrage of Menai attacks, holding firm in the face of some hulk reminiscent opposition. Though it was not until later in the half where Pilli saw their hard work pay its dividends.
A rapid, powerful run from head-band sporting midfielder Stephen Foldi payed off as he latched onto a through ball down the left flank and sent a wicked left-footed shot across goal, forcing the Menai 'keeper into a save, only for Poulos to react immediately to tuck the ball away in what was a true poacher's goal.
Trouble arose when Pilli left-back Paul Clark went down trying to tackle opposition and had to be carried off the field - leaving Pilli with no reserves. As the half drew to a close Pilli continued to work well, especially down the right wing with Daniel Costa sending numerous crosses in. Though, Poulos' tap-in was the only goal of the half as the referee signalled for half-time.
Both teams returned to the field looking rejuvinated and ready to commence the final half. Those oranges were so good.
It was barely five minutes in when Poulos grabbed his second - and what a confusngly incredible goal it was. After receiving a pass crossfield, the striker worked his way down the right side of the 18-yard box and fired a dipping half-volley goal-wards. Everyone remained silent, not knowing whether to cheer or continue with a goal kick - frankly no one knew it had gone in. The ball appeared to have hit the side netting and run along it on the outerside - only when Foldi ran into the goal area to check the balls position, screaming 'it went in!' (lol) to confirm the feat did the crowd burst into delerium and the referee blow for a goal. Alex, I'd just like you to know I never doubted you...
The game resumed with Pilli two ahead, returning to its normal pace though, with an additional air of suprise. Menai didn't have to wait long until Poulos again conjured up another magical goal. With his back to goal and 20-yards out, the striker twisted and turned, weaving away from his markers to send an extremely cheeky and skillfull chip over the 'keepers head and Pilli fans into raptures. It was later to be revealed that the player had not gone out the night before like every other game. Moral of the story: sacrificing the strip club for your team is always a good move.
Menai had it all to do with Pilli cruising three goals ahead. Nonetheless, there were still around 25 minutes left on the clock for Pilli to wind down and it should be credited to Menai that they ran it through to the final whistle, going close a few times only for a majestic display from stand-in 'keeper Burg to keep his side safe. Burg's timing throughout the match was split-second perfect, not to mention his safe hands. Lanky Pilli centre-half Daniel Fynn also put on both a brilliant aerial and ground performance, remaining quite sturdy throughout the entire match. Versitano also managed a good display and his development is becoming more obvious every week. It has to be said, midfielder Phipps and striker Squeaks' impact on the game were less than usual, hence their apparent absence was easily noticed - especially with the countless number of times Squeak was caught offside.
Pilli finished the game with 10 players after hat-trick hero Poulos was forced to leave the pitch injured - a worrying sign after Clark's departure.
Pilli's next fixture comes all the way in frikin' Barden Ridge against Barden Risdebacks 1. More news on this games' injuries to come so fingers crossed we don't have anymore dislocated knees because quite frankly, we don't kneed anymore of this (pun defintley intended, since it's heaps funny).
Initially, Pilli began the day knowing they would be down three players - Clayden, Phipps and Treacy - due to injury, work and vacation respectively, meaning the bench would be cut down to just one. Staff were given further reason for concern when frontman Poulos made contact and said he was 'stuck in traffic' - which happens to alot of professional footballers these days. What've we all learnt from that? Live in the Shire.
Thankfully, Poulos arrived just in time and a further boost to team morale came in the unlikely form of Phipps, who was racing back from Smithfield (wtf) to participate in the match. Midfielder Matthew Burg stood between the sticks, filling in for the injured Clayden who was watching from the stands. All seemed well and just as the gap-toothed referee managed to blow his whistle to signal the start of the game.
Both teams began brightly, showing an obvious hunger for the ball. As the half progressed Menai displayed aerial prowess while Pilli dominated the ground play with some skilful dribbling and passing from their apparently good-looking midfielder Jacob Healey. Pilli's defence withstood a barrage of Menai attacks, holding firm in the face of some hulk reminiscent opposition. Though it was not until later in the half where Pilli saw their hard work pay its dividends.
A rapid, powerful run from head-band sporting midfielder Stephen Foldi payed off as he latched onto a through ball down the left flank and sent a wicked left-footed shot across goal, forcing the Menai 'keeper into a save, only for Poulos to react immediately to tuck the ball away in what was a true poacher's goal.
Trouble arose when Pilli left-back Paul Clark went down trying to tackle opposition and had to be carried off the field - leaving Pilli with no reserves. As the half drew to a close Pilli continued to work well, especially down the right wing with Daniel Costa sending numerous crosses in. Though, Poulos' tap-in was the only goal of the half as the referee signalled for half-time.
Both teams returned to the field looking rejuvinated and ready to commence the final half. Those oranges were so good.
It was barely five minutes in when Poulos grabbed his second - and what a confusngly incredible goal it was. After receiving a pass crossfield, the striker worked his way down the right side of the 18-yard box and fired a dipping half-volley goal-wards. Everyone remained silent, not knowing whether to cheer or continue with a goal kick - frankly no one knew it had gone in. The ball appeared to have hit the side netting and run along it on the outerside - only when Foldi ran into the goal area to check the balls position, screaming 'it went in!' (lol) to confirm the feat did the crowd burst into delerium and the referee blow for a goal. Alex, I'd just like you to know I never doubted you...
The game resumed with Pilli two ahead, returning to its normal pace though, with an additional air of suprise. Menai didn't have to wait long until Poulos again conjured up another magical goal. With his back to goal and 20-yards out, the striker twisted and turned, weaving away from his markers to send an extremely cheeky and skillfull chip over the 'keepers head and Pilli fans into raptures. It was later to be revealed that the player had not gone out the night before like every other game. Moral of the story: sacrificing the strip club for your team is always a good move.
Menai had it all to do with Pilli cruising three goals ahead. Nonetheless, there were still around 25 minutes left on the clock for Pilli to wind down and it should be credited to Menai that they ran it through to the final whistle, going close a few times only for a majestic display from stand-in 'keeper Burg to keep his side safe. Burg's timing throughout the match was split-second perfect, not to mention his safe hands. Lanky Pilli centre-half Daniel Fynn also put on both a brilliant aerial and ground performance, remaining quite sturdy throughout the entire match. Versitano also managed a good display and his development is becoming more obvious every week. It has to be said, midfielder Phipps and striker Squeaks' impact on the game were less than usual, hence their apparent absence was easily noticed - especially with the countless number of times Squeak was caught offside.
Pilli finished the game with 10 players after hat-trick hero Poulos was forced to leave the pitch injured - a worrying sign after Clark's departure.
Pilli's next fixture comes all the way in frikin' Barden Ridge against Barden Risdebacks 1. More news on this games' injuries to come so fingers crossed we don't have anymore dislocated knees because quite frankly, we don't kneed anymore of this (pun defintley intended, since it's heaps funny).
Friday, May 7, 2010
OFFICIAL: Clayden Suffers Serious Injury
Speculative reports claiming a season-ending injury to Pilli first choice 'keeper William Clayden have been confirmed (I honestly didn't think he'd be out for that long so I went ahead and did the whole sensationalised story thing :S). The club have released a statement on the incident. 'Clayden has suffered a dislocated knee cap during monday nights training session. It is possible Clayden ill out for a possible 2 to 3 months.'
The player himself spoke exclusivley to the blog earlier today - 'unfortunately my run of bad luck has continued, but im staying optomistic about the injury and hope to be prove the medical staff wrong with an earlier return.'
When asked about how he thinks LPFC will fair without him in goals, Clayden remained positive - '[my absence] means we are losing depth in the midfield as it apears Burg will have to fill in for me, but I still think we can challenge for a finals berth.'
Some may view the news as a devastating blow for the squad, though others may revel in finally being able to possibly hold a clean sheet - though everyones mainly heaps devoed. LPFC U21's have had a turbulent last 4 weeks with the walking out of Daniel Fletcher (woof) back to his former club, reports of an unsettled Poulos and now this. Additionally, both Treacy and Phipps have been ruled out of tomorrows match leaving no reserves and me having to play a full game after almost dying of illness. F*%king hell.
The player himself spoke exclusivley to the blog earlier today - 'unfortunately my run of bad luck has continued, but im staying optomistic about the injury and hope to be prove the medical staff wrong with an earlier return.'
When asked about how he thinks LPFC will fair without him in goals, Clayden remained positive - '[my absence] means we are losing depth in the midfield as it apears Burg will have to fill in for me, but I still think we can challenge for a finals berth.'
Some may view the news as a devastating blow for the squad, though others may revel in finally being able to possibly hold a clean sheet - though everyones mainly heaps devoed. LPFC U21's have had a turbulent last 4 weeks with the walking out of Daniel Fletcher (woof) back to his former club, reports of an unsettled Poulos and now this. Additionally, both Treacy and Phipps have been ruled out of tomorrows match leaving no reserves and me having to play a full game after almost dying of illness. F*%king hell.
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
Report: Pilli 'Keeper Out for the Season?
Shock claims have emerged regarding Pilli first choice shot-stopper William Clayden - with some papers reporting the Schwarzer prodigy has sustained a season-ending injury during a recent training session. Details remain as fuzzy as your mums muff but it is speculated that the player has done damage to the most complicated articulation in the human body *cue dramatic video of that random squirrel on youtube* - the knee. News of the World has even gone so far as to state the player underwent a near-death experience and has now started to give money away to his friends and the writer of this blog. He hasn't.
More knews to follow on an incident that could have a disastrous impact on Pilli's team morale and hence title challenge.
More knews to follow on an incident that could have a disastrous impact on Pilli's team morale and hence title challenge.
Pilli Blog Reaches 1000 Views!
The Pilli blog oficially reached the 1000 page load mark and 900 unique views this week - a tally which has kept on rising. As a result, I am considering selling it to google or microsoft for a ridiculous amount of money cuz thats what seems the 'in' thing to do these days. Also, I will now go forth into the public arena with expectations that one in every twenty thousand Aussies will recognise me and ask for an autograph - which for females will be preferably in or around the chesticle area. Oh, almost forgot to thank you guys - the fans - because after all this wouldn't have been possible without you guys...well it actually wouldn't have been possible without me either so essentially its a chicken-egg scenario but meh, I'll be cliche this one time. Kk, I'm gonna go now and buy a new bed and pillow which'll fit my massive new head and ego...along with other abnormally large things...e.g. my nose. lol tricked you guys!
P.S. There have been anonymous complaints as to whether people are taking the poll seriously or not (from Jacob). So take it seriously or Jacob will bash you.
P.S. There have been anonymous complaints as to whether people are taking the poll seriously or not (from Jacob). So take it seriously or Jacob will bash you.
Saturday, May 1, 2010
So Berry Close
Lilli Pilli U21 1's will feel partly aggreived after coming out with only a 1-1 draw against fellow rivals Lilli Pilli 2's. Goals came from either side of the halves as both teams went head to head in what turned out to be a dogged affair at the near-swamp locale that is Woolloware High Oval.
The match began in gloomy-skies, with Pilli 1's donning the unfimiliar purple-coloured third kit. Pilli 1's commenced brightly, displaying confident and well structured passing. Though, this seemed to gradually patter out until around 10 minutes in when it became drowned out by the raw physicality of a clearly older and more experienced Pilli 2 side.
As the half continued Pilli 1's had the better of chances - creating them predominantely down the wings, though none were meant to be and as the half drew to a close a point blank miss from Fonseca summed up the first half.
The match began in gloomy-skies, with Pilli 1's donning the unfimiliar purple-coloured third kit. Pilli 1's commenced brightly, displaying confident and well structured passing. Though, this seemed to gradually patter out until around 10 minutes in when it became drowned out by the raw physicality of a clearly older and more experienced Pilli 2 side.
As the half continued Pilli 1's had the better of chances - creating them predominantely down the wings, though none were meant to be and as the half drew to a close a point blank miss from Fonseca summed up the first half.
The second half started where the first left off - with Pilli 1's yet to settle into the Arsenal-esque playing style they well known for. It was not until a few minutes in when the first goal creared its ugly head. Pilli 2's sent a curling indirect freekick straight into the box, which bounced lazily infront of the goal mouth only to be tapped home by a Pilli 2 player. NoW, I'm not goIng to name any names or put the bLame on any specific player but instead just say the goal was due to bad Luck...In truth it was a rather pathetic goal and will give coach Dan Andersson a focal point for the next training session.
The opening goal seemed to have rattled Pilli 1's players and re-awakened them to the stark reality that a win was now two goals away. Pilli 1's mood seemed to have lifted as they heartily battled away, constantly chiselling away at the oppositions defensive line - only for them to strike the ball way back towards Clayden. On the odd occassions where Pilli 2's did create a chance, Fynn and Thompson held firm - allowing minimal penetration and always cumming out on top.
The first half also saw Phipps send a lofted free-kick float over the cross bar and one-on-one chance scuffed by Fonseca after an immaculate through-ball from Daniel Costa. Recent signing Michael Treacy played well - adding an extra dimension to Pilli's passing upfront - filling in for a once-again absent Poulos. Midfield maestro Jacob Healey displayed glimpses of his 24 million pound price tag - sending some perfectly weighted through-balls which unforunately often came to nothing (mmm really trying hard to sound like you played well, jokes jacob you're a really good player and all the girls reckon your hot n shit).
The all-important breakthrough came around the 75-minute mark -sending Pilli 1 fans into raptures. Heaps sexy striker Fonseca manged to lose the ball mid-park, only to reclaim it and skip past an opposition player, where he then sent a cute through-ball onto to Phipps who controlled it beautifully and smashed it home from outside the box on the half volley.
The second goal of the game provided a massive boost for the away side who seemed determined on pushing for the crucial winning goal. Though it was not meant to be and the half wound down - the final whistle blowing for time. Pilli's next fixture is up against Meani Hawks 1 - who up until recently had led the table. And soz for the late post, my throat hurts like a bitch.
Kurtis Thompson Voted Team Manwhore
Kurtis Thompson has been voted the most likely LPFC U21 player to sleep with a teammates' ex girlfriend - winning with 12/30 votes.
Congratulation Kurtis.
Congratulation Kurtis.
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